Woman ; A Chemical Analysis
|Accepted at 53.6kg, but known to vary from 40-200kg|
|Copious quantities in all urban areas|
- Surface usually covered in painted film.
- Boils at nothing; freezes without known reason.
- Melts if given special treatment.
- Bitter if incorrectly used.
- Found in various states from virgin metal to common ore.
- Yields if pressure applied in correct places.
- Has great affinity for gold, silver and a range of precious stones.
- Absorbs great quantities of expensive substances.
- May explode spontaneously without prior warning and for no known reason.
- Insoluble in liquids, but activity increases greatly by saturation in alcohol.
- Most powerful money reducing agent known to man.
- Highly ornamental, especially in sports cars.
- Can be a great aid to relaxation.
- Very effective cleaning agent.
- Pure specimen turns rosy pink when discovered in the natural state.
- Turns green when placed beside a better specimen.
- Highly dangerous except in experienced hands.
- Illegal to possess more than one, although several can be maintained at different locations as long as specimens do not come into direct contact with each other.
- Should you experience itching, burning or rash, discontinue use immediately and seek medical treatment.